Focus Your Life on Desire, Not Fear

Feed your desire until it completely dwarfs your fears

What you want most in this world often resides alongside those things that scare you the most. That's one big reason why some people don't follow through. It's why they inexplicably don't act on opportunities. It's why some remain in Neutral while other, "less talented" people have long since shifted into Drive.

In other words, the problem isn't that they don't care. The problem is they care too much.

Does this sound familiar?

Our fears and dreams are tightly linked. Sure, different people behave and react differently. Some are certainly inspired by their dreams, and any fears they have pale in comparison to the lure of getting what they most want in life. But not everyone works this way; there are significant numbers of people whose dreams and fears are packed together. You may be one of them.

If you don’t believe this applies to you, please take a few moments to ponder this simple exercise:

How many behaviors did you circle? (If I’m honest, I’d circle at least eight.)

Having fears doesn’t make you weak or a coward; it makes you human. Most of the fears I’m highlighting today don’t make you quake in terror. They simply prevent you from actively pursuing your dreams.

Here are a few ways to keep reaching for what you truly want:

Want more? Here’s a 90-second video I made a few years back that explains a simple formula for overcoming your fears… and how it worked so well for me.

In my experience, the most insidious thing about fears is that they fit so neatly into your life that you stop seeing the ways those fears are holding you back. We all have “avoid-at-all cost” fears that have been around so long we don’t even recognize them. For example, perhaps you routinely jump off cliffs and race motorcycles, so you tell yourself you are strong and courageous… but, in fact, what you really really fear is being emotionally vulnerable or getting too close to another human being.

My intention isn’t to diagnose you or make you feel bad. To the contrary, I want to empower you to be self-aware and realize where you could benefit from tackling your scary tendencies head-on.

We all have fears, and they will never go away completely.

But once you understand the simple equation at the top of this post ( Desire > Fear), it becomes obvious that you have a choice: focus on your desire, or focus on your fear.

Focusing on your fear is paralyzing. It won't make things better, and will only make them worse.

But focusing on your desire has two benefits. First, it is empowering and motivating. It gets you to act in a positive manner. Second, it distracts you from your fear. The more you visualize that which you desire, the less power your fears have over you.

Dream away!