How to Get Out of Prison (for People Who Don't Even See the Walls)
You cannot escape a prison until you realize that prison exists, wrote the late Anthony De Mello in his tiny gem of a book, The Way to Love.
He says that the vast majority of human beings never realize that they “live and die as prison inmates,” imprisoned by “the beliefs and traditions of your society and culture and by the ideas, prejudices, attachments and fears of your past experiences.”
He suggests four steps to escape this prison.
First*, see the walls. Recognize that you have so many layers of stuff between you and reality that your mind has gone to sleep.
Second, contemplate the walls. Spend hours observing your habits, beliefs, fears, attachments and so on.
Third, spend time observing the people and things around you. Really see them. For example, look at the face of a friend without projecting all your preconceptions about him, her or them.
Fourth, quietly observe how your mind functions. If you do this long enough, he says, “you will find it so much more absorbing than any river or movie.”
*Step One should really be to grab a copy of this book. It’s literally smaller than my phone, and lately I have been picking up the book almost every time I’m tempted to pick up my phone.